Antjie

Antjie

Tuesday 8 October 2013

"Well, that didn't happen!"

"Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy." Leo Buscaglia 

Today's story isn't so much about worrying. Although it is a main point here. What it's really about is finding a solution, looking at the bright side of things instead.

Like discovering that being old is a great thing. You have so much to share if someone will just take time to ask.

What you need is EPS!

Perks Pearl of Wisdom
"To gain wisdom one must make mistakes and learn from them. One must lose in order to gain. One must listen instead of always making noise. One must ask before acting. One must act instead of simply observing. One must trust the Voice inside."
Bob Perks

 
Today's message: 

"Well, that didn't happen!"
By Bob Perks

"Chronic worrying affects your daily life so much that 
it interferes with your appetite, lifestyle habits, 
relationships, sleep, and job performance. Many people 
who worry excessively are so anxiety-ridden that they 
seek relief in harmful lifestyle habits such as overeating, 
cigarette smoking, or using alcohol and drugs." WebMD

When I'm around older people I feel the need to ask them 
about life. I want to know how they see things now that
they've been through so much. To pass up on an opportunity
like this would be foolish. 

It's like going to a travel website for directions. They've 
been down the road ahead of me. They know all the twists and 
turns.

I always gain some insight and often a good story.

Talking to "Joe" was no different.

"I was a worrier," he said. "I spent way too much time
worrying about things that never happened."

He went on to share a few with me and each time ended
the story with, "Well, that didn't happen!"

"So, you said you used to be a worrier. What changed you?"
I asked.

"EPS...Every possible scenario," he replied.

"I don't understand." I said.

"Well, when I worried I never worried about one thing. If I 
worried about a pain I had, I didn't just focus on one thing.
I worried about "every possible scenario." It was my heart, 
my prostate, my lungs, my back. I thought I had cancer, I had
heart disease, you name it." 

He went on to tell me how he would toss and turn every night
playing out each possibility until he couldn't think of anything
else.

Then he'd add, "Well, that didn't happen!"

"So, how did you change it?" I asked.

"I turned the whole thing around. I used the same approach to
every concern I had, but looked at it from the positive side.

"That's remarkable!" I said.

"I had to. I loved her too much!"

"Who?"

"My girlfriend. She couldn't stand listening to me foolishly worrying 
about things," he said with a slight smile.

Then he placed his hand on my shoulder, looked me straight 
in the eye and said, "I asked her to marry me. I told her 
I was crazy about her. I couldn't live without her."

Then there was an awkward silence. A tear formed in his eye
and I knew what he was going to say. I even said it with him.

"Well, that didn't happen!"

We laughed.

"So, I knew in order to win her over I needed to change.
That's when I came up with EPS..."Every Possible Scenario."

He continued, "If I am concerned about something I make a 
list of all the good things that could happen instead of 
all the bad. I began showing her the list."

"So, you two got married?"

Wait for it...

"Well, that didn't happen! I tried to make a list of all 
the good reasons to marry her and couldn't. I dumped her.
I found someone else who met those qualities better."

"Every possible scenario?" I asked.

"Yes, indeed!" he said. "Yes, indeed!"

"I believe in you!"
Bob Perks